


Never Knew Love

by AceyEnn



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, Death, Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-31
Updated: 2011-10-31
Packaged: 2017-10-25 02:48:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/270888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceyEnn/pseuds/AceyEnn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the kink meme. The Handmaid finally dies, but it's not quite what she had wished for. Rated for some violence and a Precision F Strike.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Knew Love

**Author's Note:**

> This is unbeta'd and generally terrible. :D

The Handmaid had been looking forward to her death for millenia. She just hadn't quite expected it to _hurt_   
like this.

The Condesce had simply rammed her trident right through the Handmaid's torso, piercing her lungs and just barely (and, the Handmaid thought, rather unfortunately) missing her heart, and then pulled it out again.

To be fair, the Handmaid hadn't put up much of a fight. She had wanted this. She just...hadn't wanted the pain.

She stood shakily for a few moments before collapsing.

As she lay there dying, she marveled grimly at how much blood she was losing. It wasn't the first time she had seen so much blood, but coming from her, it was strangely horrifying. And that's discounting her near-complete inability to breathe, which was bringing back horrific memories from her childhood.

Childhood. Something she never got to truly experience. Even on the death world she had helped create, there was still a certain innocence to the very young. There were children who had no real inkling of how horrible life could be, who had only truly known love and happiness and _peace_   
.

And it dawned on her that she'd never known love, either, platonic or romantic, and that thought brought her to tears.

Eventually her sadness and fear mercifully glazed over into a strange numbness. The Handmaid felt almost calm, for once, and when her body finally gave out completely she welcomed it.

And she was gone.

 

The Handmaid awoke in a green room, and, once she got her bearings, proceeded to scream "FUCK!" at the top of her lungs.

This wasn't right. Had she been placed in some sort of ironic hell for her crimes against troll society--crimes she had never wanted to commit? Had she been brought back to life and locked in the room she'd spent her youth in? She was horribly confused, and so very scared.

She broke down sobbing. Death wasn't supposed to be like this.

"Are you okay?"

The Handmaid turned, and saw a ghostly young girl--no older than six sweeps--who bore a striking resemblance to the Condesce. Unlike the Condesce, though, there was no malice in her eyes. Just... _concern._  


"...Are you her descendant?" the Handmaid asked quietly.

"Who, the Empress? Yup! I'm Feferi. What's your name? You look a lot like a friend of mine...you're Aradia's ancestor, aren't y--oh cod, are you who I think you are?"

"Yeah." The Handmaid looked away, rather ashamed. "You probably know me as the Demoness, right?"

"Mhm. You don't really look that evil though. Just kind of sad!" Feferi hugged her. "Don't be sad, please. Being dead is actually pretty okay!"

"You're hugging me."

"Yeah! You looked like you needed a hug. You kinda still do. You look like you need a lot of hugs, actually."

"I've...I've never been hugged before," the Handmaid admitted.

Feferi gasped, shocked. "Really? But...everyone needs to be hugged sometimes! Even bad guys!"

"Please, Feferi. I'm...I don't even know. I really am less evil than you probably think I am." The Handmaid sighed sadly.

"Then why did you do so many awful things?"

The Handmaid broke down again, hugging Feferi tightly. "I'm sorry, I'm _sorry_   
! I was a pawn, okay? I was raised by a horrible man to be Lord English's slave, and I...oh God, _what have I done_   
?"

"Shh." Feferi put a finger to the Handmaid's lips. "Please don't be scared or sad. A lot of my fronds have done reely awful things too!"

"Then...why are you friends with them?"

"Sometimes I wonder that too. But they're reely good people at heart! Maybe you are too, I dunno. I've never actually met you before, I don't think. All I know is the stories I've been told."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

The Handmaid wiped some of her tears away. This young lady was so unlike her ancestor...it was nearly impossible to believe that if Alternia hadn't been destroyed, _she_   
would be next in line for the throne. 

"So you said I looked a lot like one of your friends, huh?" the Handmaid finally said.

"Yeah! Her name's Aradia, she's glubbing awesome. Reely nice girl. Would you like to meet her? I've seen her floating around lately. She's not dead anymore, but she shore likes to visit!"

"...Yes."

"Great!" Feferi grabbed the Handmaid by the wrist and dragged her to the next bubble (really, the Handmaid hadn't even realized she _could_   
move between bubbles). "I'm so excited for you, miss. I think you'll be happier here."

Waiting for them was a girl about Feferi's age, who for all the world looked just like the Handmaid had as a child, only with red fairy wings and a smile. "Hello!" chirped the girl. "I'm Aradia, I think Feferi was talking about me. This is her bubble, by the way."

The Handmaid looked around. It seemed like they were deep underwater, in some sort of shimmering cavern. "It shows," she commented. Feferi just grinned.

And a few minutes later the three of them were off to explore. "There's so much to check out here," Aradia gushed. "It's a lovely place."

She turned to the Handmaid. "I hope you enjoy it here."

"I think I will. Thanks."

And as they moved on to the next dream bubble, the Handmaid thought, for the first time in who knows how long, that things might just work out for the best.


End file.
